someone who has been date-raped asks: how to have a good sex life without triggering panic symptoms?
i’d sure like to know, if y’all have some tips.
i feel like it has been long enough (3 1/2 years) that this shouldn’t be happening!! i want some control over my damn mind and body, already. it isn’t that my boyfriend is pressuring me. i’m just as up for it as he is. but i start to have my old panic attack symptoms when penetration starts, so we stop, i go home and punch stuff, and he feels awful.
the only way i have managed to have consensual sex, is once, i drank 6 beers. i hardly remember anything. my boyfriend felt really bad about it and didn’t want to try anything for a few weeks. (i quit drinking in august.)
but i am determined to have control over my body and have some damn sex if i want to.
is there anyone here who has actually has a good sex life now? how did you do it? did it get better with time?
i have had this happen, a long time ago. it does take a long time. what made mine worse was that it was my best friend’s husband, we weren’t on a date, i was just visiting, and she went out with her boyfriend. whole other story
but, it took a while to get over.
the suggestions of seeking counseling group or individual, is a good idea.
sounds weird, but somehow you need to forgive the creep. as long as you hold that anger, that person still has control over you, and you have a great partner now, to be able to deal with this too.
in the past, the way i deal with traumatic things, is to write my feelings down, in letter form, get them all out..then burn the letter to let it go..
wish you and your partner the best
blessings..
Comments
Comment from wintersun
Time December 27, 2009 at 8:02 pm
If you are having panic attacks because of a post traumatic event, then the best advise for you in my personal opinion is to seek professional help and not help over the internet. Post Traumatic Stress Disorders requires counselling and possibly medication which only an experienced and authorised practitioner can help with. You will be safer in such hands than from laypersons (like me) advising you.
I do very much hope you feel better soon. Good luck.
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Comment from darkshadow300200
Time December 27, 2009 at 8:50 pm
can you talk to someone, like a therapy group, to help you deal with the triggering before intercourse? maybe you have to talk to others to get more of a solution than punching things. i hope you can heal from this ordeal,
hugs
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Comment from darlin12009
Time December 27, 2009 at 9:32 pm
i have had this happen, a long time ago. it does take a long time. what made mine worse was that it was my best friend’s husband, we weren’t on a date, i was just visiting, and she went out with her boyfriend. whole other story
but, it took a while to get over.
the suggestions of seeking counseling group or individual, is a good idea.
sounds weird, but somehow you need to forgive the creep. as long as you hold that anger, that person still has control over you, and you have a great partner now, to be able to deal with this too.
in the past, the way i deal with traumatic things, is to write my feelings down, in letter form, get them all out..then burn the letter to let it go..
wish you and your partner the best
blessings..
References :
experiance
Comment from The kissman
Time December 27, 2009 at 7:45 pm
You failed to say what gender you are..
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